Dh: Your hair is like a casserole.
Me: Excuse me?
Dh: It always looks better the second day.
In to see doctor for swollen tonsils. I can feel them in my throat.
Doctor: You have children?
Me: Yes, three.
Doctor: You breastfed?
Me: Yes, all of them.
Doctor: Well, you know how after you finish breastfeeding things hang a little lower...?
Me (thinking): Did you just compare my tonsil to a boob?
Son is cleaning off table.
Dh/dad: Son is cleaning off table?? (clutches chest)This is the big one! You hear that, Elizabeth? I'm coming to join ya, honey!
Son: Who's Elizabeth?
I LOL'd at all of them.
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