Recovering

It's been most of a month since I've written. The combination of Christmas, travelling and some nasty colds devastated my routine of writing regularly on my blog. I miss it. Something about writing seems bigger than my actual life. So, here I am, dedicated to reviving my habit.

Justifiable Homicide?

To my faithful readers, I am sorry I've been gone so long. First, I was sick and upon recovery, discovered to my horror it was the Christmas season. Yes, I am one of those bah-humbug type people. I am trying very hard this year to be positive, and to enjoy the season, to give the kids good memories instead of a grumpy mom, who, already overwhelmed, now has to SHOP on top it.

So, armed with a new attitude, I went to the local, small toy store. It is an upscale shop, carrying more educational and high quality toys such as wooden train sets and cute puppets and the like. I was proud of myself for having made two selections, my first purchases of the year, and made my way to the counter. Timewise, I was doing okay, but needed to get back to pick up dd#1 from her piano lesson. In front of me, another customer chatted with the store clerk, clearly not in any hurry. She had found everything she needed except the adorable little porcupine puppet (who'd want a porcupine puppet??) that she'd bought here before.

"Oh, wait," said the clerk. "There may be one in the back." She disappeared before I could say a word, and I stood holding my items and looking at my watch.

The customer then turned to me and said in a syrupy voice, "Oh, I do hope she has it, because then I'll be all done with my Christmas shopping." I fantasized about yanking her hair, wondering if it would be considered assault. I gave her an insincere smile and said nothing. I not only wasn't finished with my shopping, I had barely begun.

The clerk returned with the blasted puppet, and started ringing up the purchases, all small items. They were small, the woman explained, because her entire family was going on a Carribean cruise for Christmas and they couldn't take large gifts. I contemplated murder, but wasn't sure I could prove justifiable homicide. Would the judge understand that I'd been pushed to the edge?

After she left, the clerk rang up my order, and through my gritted teeth, I had to tell her that she'd added it up wrongly, and I instead owed her $7 more than she thought. I barely made it back in time to pick up dd#1 but at least I escaped jail time.

Winter Sky

I've been sick these past few days with a bad cold. I haven't felt much like writing, particularly since I like to write with a sense of humor. Nothing much has seemed funny these past few days. I think I'm pulling out of it though. Just feel like a horse is sitting on my chest.

The above photo was taken by Lauren in our back pasture before a storm that flooded our yard and barn. Winter is truly coming. 

Black Friday

Yesterday was Black Friday, and I did something I've NEVER done and swore never to do - I went shopping on the day after Thanksgiving. There was one item at the local Wollymart that I wanted and a few groceries to get us through the weekend. Of course, the item was sold out, having gone to those willing to stand in the dark at the starting line and knock people over in the race for the treasured item.

Most of the store was empty. Nearly every single shopper was in the electronics department. It was crawling like an anthill. The Christmas cheer was nowhere to be seen, as of course, it was still Thanksgiving. People clogged the aisles with their carts, and glared if you dared an "excuse me" to try to get around them. After giving up the battle, I went to the grocery section and easily glided through. Everyone was full from Thanksgiving, and needed no food.

Leaving the store, I saw a car pull out in front of another car, resulting in a loud honking and rude gesture. Merry Christmas to all and to all a good shopping.

Lauren doing "homework". She's reading The Pearl. Life is just so difficult.

In the leaves.

Anna going into the leaves!

Lauren enjoying the fall.

Caught Eavesdropping

Last night, I caught myself eavesdropping. It was perfectly innocent, and understandable. I sat at a restaurant table with my brother, who thinks a loud belch passes as dinner conversation, and my 3 year old. His conversation was following the lines of "this is the salt, this is the pepper, this is the cheese, these are the red things you put on your pizza...." So, I found myself a little mentally bored while waiting for the food to arrive.

Across from us, two couples sat, the women talking right across their men as if they weren't there. "Yes, she put her engagement on hold," I heard the one say. Interesting, I thought. That speaker looked younger than the other. Maybe the engaged was a friend of hers, and she was telling her mom about it. "Why?" asked the mom. "Well, she went to a party at her fiance's house....[unintelligible conversation].....she wasn't invited.....[more unintelligible conversation]....therapist thinks she shouldn't marry him."

Wow, I thought, that is quite a story. I wonder why the woman is in therapy.....Wait, the young woman said, "Oh, you didn't see it yet? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to spoil it for you." They were talking about Desperate Housewives! It wasn't even a real story. I guess that's what I get for eavesdropping.

Optimism

This is one of my favorite photos from our vacation this year. Wm. never even paused to think whether or not he could lift this chain on a battleship. Optimism .

Appliance Woes

I really wasn't going to blog today, it being Sunday and all. My day off, yeah? But I just have to blog this. I have to release this outta my brain. I was reading Fish In My Hair, whose oven door fell off, and the days events came back to me.

I would be happy for my oven door to fall off. You can put that back on. Today, while painting the water damage spots on the ceiling, I kneeled accidentally on the stove top. The GLASS stove top that wasn't anchored properly in the corner where I knelt. Don't try this at home. The glass shattered. It broke the burner underneath.

Now, for those of you that are justifiably asking whatever was I doing on top of the stove, it is a "drop in" meaning it is part of the countertop. I stepped off my ladder, onto the counter to get the one spot on the other side of the counter. I have amnesia when it comes to the actual accident and cannot remember why I knelt down, missing the counter top and nailing the exact spot on the stove that would cause appliance failure.

Together with the oven sensor which repeatedly gives me an "F2" (which we all know what that means) and the rocker switch that is broken, the estimated repairs are about $488, parts only.
Except that the glass is on backorder, maybe not even available.

But I have my entire extended family on my side coming for Thanksgiving dinner! So, I'd be willing to buy a new oven. Hey, mine is at minimum ten years old, probably more like fifteen (it came with the house). The only problem is that the type of stove "drop-in" is available special order only. I would go shamelesly begging at appliance stores tomorrow, maybe buy a floor model. I drive a pickup - I'll cash and literally carry. Hey, I'll install myself - except....

This week my dear brother is visiting, who despite the odd looks he gets for his disabilites, has never met a stranger and stops them to get right up in their face and say "HI". He would not be an asset in appliance shopping and begging. On the other hand, if I could get my three year old screaming and get my brother to give the clerk a big wet kiss with his overgrown mustache, maybe they'd do anything to get me out of there. Lord, help me!

Food Disasters

In Keeping with my Sunday reruns of good, old posts, here is one about
Food Disasters
Tuesday, December 28, 2004


My husband says we are destined to become his parents. Perhaps he is right. Just the other day, without thinking I responded to his query about the banana bread I'd just baked with "That's not for you!" Baked for our upcoming Christmas celebrations, it was being circled like fresh kill by turkey vultures. I relented and let them eat it, thinking of my father-in-law, who claims to never get to eat the great food my mother-in-law makes because it is for the church or some other function.

Food elicits good memories for most of us, but also vivid memories when the result is not so good. Most of us have a turkey story. I remember seeing my husband and mother-in-law trying to turn a 30 pound turkey and seeing it roll across the floor. In my own family, we remember the time I heard my mother scream from the kitchen. Our standard poodle had stolen the whole raw turkey from the counter, tearing a wing from it. Mom later served the cooked turkey, remarking how sad it was that the poor turkey was born with only one wing.

Then, there was the time that my visiting sister just wanted a nice cup of coffee, first thing in the morning. Absentmindedly, I had used my usual sugar container to store my canning salt. Poor Teresa uses a lot of sugar in her coffee. Next thing I knew, she was spewing coffee in the sink. "Are you trying to poison me?" she choked. After I realized what had happened and got up from the floor after collapsing with laughter, I explained.

My family will remember the time that I took extra pains to make two beautiful custard pies to give to friends as a thank you gift for rides to work. My mother came running to my screams when we discovered that my mentally handicapped brother had eaten the entire filling of one pie, and was working on the second, scooping the filling out with his fingers. Arggggg...!

There are probably many more - like did you know that you can't use bread flour to make a cake, or that black walnuts don't taste at all like regular walnuts - but I'll save for another time. Perhaps you have some food disasters?

National Toy Hall of Fame

Perhaps, like me, you are a bit surprised to even hear there is such a thing as the National Toy Hall of Fame. But, perhaps not. It seems these days there are all kinds of Halls of Fame. Anyway, I like to listen to National Public Radio (NPR) while cooking. On All Things Considered, they announced that the giant cardboard box was just inducted. I suppose it should go into the hall of fame as in a thing of the past because when we recently received our new refrigerator, it came nude! Boxless! The kids were disappointed.

I remember many a day when we spent cutting holes for doors and windows, marking up the sides, seeing if we could tip over in it, and generally having a good time. My girls also did this 10 years back. Now, it seems that the box must cost extra, for no box came with my frig.

The other two toys were Candyland and the Jack-in-the-Box. Now, I'll vote for the J-in-the-Box as Wm recently discovered this at Cracker Barrel, and just loves it. Perhaps a good Christmas present. But Candyland? I can't tell you how we moaned anytime our kids wanted to play that game. Okay, okay, it's educational. Teaches colors, numbers and all that. AND is extremely boring. Just when you think you are almost done, you get that card for tinky-winkly lollipop-land that sends you almost back to the beginning. I'd be willing to lose, but EVERYONE gets sent back, and it drags on for hours. Chutes and Ladders is another such game.

My vote would be for the giant box, definitely. The best things in life were free.

Updates

I thought today would be a good time to catch up on some updates from past posts:

Horse Woes
The horse, Nova, that Lauren had purchase was returned in October to the woman from whom we bought him. After much expense, we concluded that it would be a very long time before he was right again, and that at Lauren's age, we couldn't afford the time or money to rehabilitate him. On his return, the lady told me that she'd spoken to the breeder who disclosed that the poor thing had gotten caught in a tractor tire (used unwisely to hold a round bale) as a yearling. There was swelling in the area, but since it went down, they thought it wasn't permanent damage. Evidently, they were wrong.

Kicked in the Face by a Mule on Thursday, November 03, 2005: It was just a bump on my nose, nicely healed and flat now. No skin cancer, thank goodness. I seriously doubt the sanity of those that undergo plastic surgery for cosmetic reasons.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005 Teaching Compassion and Responsibility :
Lauren quit her job, both because of a need for more time to study but also, and largely, due to a difference in philosophy of treatment of animals with her employer. I called to offer a home to the animal that we felt needed medical attention, but was refused. We offered to come help in the treatment, but heard nothing. I offered some advice given to me by a woman who had an animal with a similar infection and was told it would be done. At that point, we've done all we could I think. The animal was not in immediate danger, and we saw that it was being treated better as we drove by. It was difficult to call and discuss it, but I think it was an important life lesson.

Tools of the Trade:
I bought a new refrigerator! This is the first new one since I was married! It is a bottom mount. The first day, I saw the advantage in this. Wm. stood before it and yelled, "Mom, I'm hungry and I can't reach the food!" He can, however, reach the ice, and can now get himself a cup with ice and water from the bathroom sink. How nice!

Today, I picked up my brother, George, for a vacation at our house for a week. George was born with hydrocephalus and has multiple disabilities. He is as he put it "so excited" to be here.
He is musically stuck in his childhood, and likes to play the same songs over and over. Cher's "Half Breed", Billy Don't be A Hero, the Carpenters, to name a few, are already carving fresh grooves in my brain. Tomorrow, a trip to buy him nice headphones will be in order. Interestingly, he and my son are playing well together, as George is probably mentally about Wm's age in a lot of ways. Interesting to explain to Wm that George is a man's size but really is more like Wm. It should be an interesting week, no?

'Tis the Season..

For giving! And I'm not talking charitable donations. I'm talking about the hackers and sneezers and coughers that are everywhere! Last Sunday at Church, there were people there that should have been in a hospital, or at the very least at home. I don't suppose it would be very cool to pull out my anti-bacterial wipes after the "Sign of the Peace" handshake, but gee, would a nod do? Gloves, maybe?

I wonder that people feel compelled to take their children out even though they are sick. Not too long ago, I ran into an aquaintance at the Super W in the grocery section. We greeted each other cheerily, and then I asked if school was out, as her boy who attended public school was with her. No, she sidled up to me and my toddler and whispered, "don't get too close to him. He has strep and we came in to get his medicine and I thought I'd pick up a few things while we were here". I looked over at the boy who had his hands all over the grocery cart. A free gift for the next shopper. Lovely.

On the Phone

Now, I am not a big phone talker and never have been. But being a woman requires the ability to talk or at least listen on the phone, and to do it well. It's like a job requirement. Anyway, I just love it when you are in a conversation and the person on the other end gives you the boot. You know what I mean. They try to gently get you off the line by saying "I'm going to let you go now" or "I won't keep you any longer".

You and I both know that this person is really saying "I'm done with this conversation and I want to hang up on you now". Okay, so that wouldn't be so polite, but do they really think you don't know what they mean?

Dh at work has unfortuately been the brunt of my aggravation when I hear typing in the background. This is a cue, my dear sisters, that someone isn't listening.

And what's up with all the wrong numbers lately and the rudeness? Evidently, there are many phone numbers close to mine, because I get at least two wrong numbers a day, all looking for different places. Invariably, one of these calls start by someone asking "Who is this?" Duh, you called me?? What ever happened to good, old phone manners?

Education: Opposing Viewpoints

In the book Education: Opposing Viewpoints, there are a series of essays giving opposing views on education. Skimming through it, I noticed two on homeschooling, so took it home from the library to read. Here are two things I wanted to share with you from the book that I found interesting:

In the chapter "Standardized Testing and Assement Do Not Improve Education", a cartoon by David Horsey was synidicated to read "If Mozart and Michelangelo were students in today's American schools". In this link, it reads "Washington's schools" as it was originally featured in a Seattle paper.

The other was the following paragraph, entitled Developing Thoughtful Citizens:

School leaders should recognize that the goals of multicultural education are highly consistent with those of the nation's schools: to develop thoughtful citizens who can function effectively in the world of work and in the civic community. Ways must be found for schools to recognize and respect the cultures and languages of students from diverse groups while at the same time working to develop an overarching national culture to which all groups will have allegiance.
-James A. Banks, School Administrator, May 1999.

Interesting, isn't it? Not one word about learning, enjoying learning, discovering passions and the world. Nothing about becoming good parents, able to make good families. It is about making good workers and voters of our children.

The Best of Everything - Letter Received

In The Best of Everything, I asked if you had something that you considered the "best". Here is a letter I received by email that reminds us that our children are the best and that sometimes, the best things are those we might take for granted:

Dear Junosmom,

In my early years, my family was poor. I worked from the time I was 14. There are some things I truly appreciate and would miss. Let's begin with a little thing. I love having a coffee grinder and buying coffee beans (water processed decaf) to grind each morning for two or three cups of coffee. I love having a top loading Maytag Neptune clothes washer. I know I would miss having the ordinary clothes dryer which sits next to it. I like being able to wash and dry anytime I like and almost anything fabric.

Many people take having an air conditioner and furnace for granted. I have to say, I know what it is like not to be cool when it is torrid outside and what it is like to freeze indoors when it is cold outside. I am grateful that we have always had both when needed during
our marriage.

I have also always had my own vehicle to drive. I can go where I want, when I want. Not everyone has that, which many take for granted. I have had a dishwasher most of my married life but I don't mind hand washing so much as I would mind going out to a laundromat. When I have had to do that, it hasn't been pleasant. I enjoy having a
refrigerator with filtered water dispenser and icemaker.

I am grateful for the warmth and comfort of our waterbed, which we have slept in since 1982. We have had a pool and spa at home since 1990. For me, the spa is something I would miss a great deal. It is heavenly to soak in its warm water under the stars. I rarely find the pool warm enough, but when I do go in, I must admit to loving the luxury.

For the most part, my working life ended in 1983 when our older son was diagnosed with leukemia and I needed to stop my part-time job to be at home. I did substitute teach a little when he was in primary school but only occasionally for a couple of years when his health was strong.

Brian was born in 1980. This time of year, in November, when he was 3, he was diagnosed with leukemia. He survived 5 years. Most people assume a cure after that time. That spring, he had a relapse and underwent chemotherapy a second time. He made it through the three years of therapy and then relapsed again. He was twelve years and four months old at the start of this relapse.

One of his sisters was a perfect match so he underwent treatment again, followed by a bone marrow transplant on President Clinton's inauguration day. He suffered an infection before the transplant took hold and died March 12, 1993.

He would have been 13 on July 4, 1993. Like his sisters, Brian was labeled gifted by the schools. He admired President Lincoln and wanted to be a judge. The world missed out and we miss him.
Brian is survived by his two healthy, loving and successful adult sisters and his autistic little brother, whom I homeschool. Nobody would want to trade places with my life. I am grateful for a loving husband whose salary allows me to be at home in relative luxury.

--From Southern California

You Are Surprised?

http://www.crosswalk.com/news/1362503.html

Snip:

But the Ninth circuit ruled against the parents, saying in effect parents have no fundamental right “to be the exclusive provider of information regarding sexual matters for their children.” It also said parents have no right to dispute whatever the public schools choose to teach in sex education.

Are Your Kids Safe on the 'Net?

Okay, a serious post for a change. We all know that this world today isn't the world we grew up in. The pace is faster, the information is more available, the dangers are more present. I wasn't surprised when I watched MSNBC's Dateline report last night about online child predators. What did surprise me is that posing as young teens home alone, they were able to get 19 men in three days to show up at the house to prey on a young girl or boy. These were people that the "child" might have met in a chat room online. They were an assortment of people, professionals, a rabbi, a teacher of disabled children.

Most of the suggestions as to how to prevent this from happening to your child (the statistics are that 1 in 5 of children online will be solicited for sex) have to do with being alert and involved parents. Here are some of the suggestions from What you don’t know can hurt kids:

Teach your children to:
Think before they click:
With whom are they chatting or e-mailing, what are they saying and how are they saying it?
Will the person on the other end know they are joking?
Walk away from the computer and “Take 5” before responding to something that upsets them online
Avoid spreading rumors, assisting in cyberbullying or sharing private communications online.

Follow the golden rule of cyberspace:
Don’t do anything online that you wouldn’t do in real life!
Follow responsible safety practices yourself:
Install spyware and adware blocking software on your computer
Make sure you have a working firewall
Install anti-virus software and update it regularly
Take advantage of spam-blocking tools offered by your Internet provider or e-mail software

And more importantly, talk to your kids. Tell them frankly about the dangers. Ask them with whom are you talking. Don't allow internet access in a private place, such as a bedroom. Be suspicious of any gifts or phone calls from people you don't know. Web cams have become a particular problem and should be allowed only in public parts of the house.

Blogs: I've noticed many children, particularly pre-teens and teens, are starting blogs. Blogs are a good thing, encouraging writing. Make sure, however, that your child does not publish any personal information, email address, or photos that could lead one of these sickos to your baby.

Net Nanny is a reasonably priced program that can block chat rooms and objectionable websites. It has the added feature of being able to limit the times of day that a child has access to the Internet, for example not after you yourself go to bed.

The Internet and computers are valuable resources, but the pace of the technology changes rapidly. We owe it to our children, if we are allowing it in our house, to keep up with ways to keep them safe.

To read more:
Catching potential Internet sex predators
Wired Safety
Blog Sites, Profile Sites, Diary Sites or Social-Networking Sites
Wired Kids