Notes to People

To Louise the Cat:  You still haven't learned, have you?  We KNOW you were on the kitchen table while we were out since your face is now orange, though it is normally white.  The crime was confirmed when you threw up three orange lily petals.  That should teach you.

To Dad:  Thank you for the Easter lilies.

To William:  Of course you couldn't have known that I was cleaning the horse's sheath, but please don't come shouting "HEY MOM!!!" when you enter the barn, and then proceed to loudly talk about the television show where an alligator grabs a man's arm and drags him around the pond and how alligators kill.  Yes, I know the man lived, but all the alligator talk killed the horse's relaxed mood.

To the teen boy in the gold sedan who shouted out the window as you passed my riding arena twice today:  Firstly, shouting at a rider on a horse risks the rider's life.  On your second trip back, I'm sure that with my riding helmet and sunglasses on that you could not see that I am old enough (at least in Kentucky) to be your grandmother, but I think if you had known, you might not have shouted "TITS" out your window.   Thanks for the compliment though, I guess.

To my family:  Don't let Daisy the Dog lick you.  You don't want to know.

To my nephew:  It really isn't a fossilized turd I gave you.  It was a horn coral fossil.