Infamous

One of my bestest friends spilled the beans to her friends about my recording session today, claiming in her email that one of her girlfriends (me) was to be "infamous". I'm sure that's probably closerto the truth than I'd like it to be, since the definition states "to have a bad reputation". Still, I'm unlikely to be famous either after today, but it was a rewarding learning experience. (See, Becky, I told you that if you didn't read my blog, you'd end up in it, even if you DO know the difference between infamous and famous and are yanking my chain!)

So, what's it all about? Well, I sent in one of my first blogs, Tools of the Trade, to the local public radio station. Expecting rejection, I was shocked to get an email within an hour asking me to revise it to fit 330-350 words. This I did, and the returning email promised that Bobby would be contacting me to record my "commentary".

Looking like he just stepped away from the drums of a rock band, Bobby led me to a sound proof booth. With hands shaking, I sat at a desk with an enormous brown microphone and read my piece. After I managed to pull several frogs from my throat and wonder if I was developing sinusitis, allergies or was it just nerves, I began to calm down, and enjoyed trying to get the tone to sound just right. The interesting thing is that with digital recording, the entire program doesn't have to be perfect, but can be patched together to sound perfect.

It will be my first time on the radio. It was a TOO COOL experience. My mind wandered and I fantasized about working in such a clean environment where the desks weren't covered in ketchup, I didn't have to clear stacks of books and wadded paper to sit down, and no one was yelling, "MOM, I NEED YOU. NOW!"

Shaking off my delirium, I heard Bobby say that the last reading was fine and within the time allowed. My two minutes of fame, (what happened to my other 13 minutes?) will occur in June sometime. So, blogsters, get out your best blogs, polish them up, send them to your local public radio and you, too, can be "infamous".

Here's the revised blog that I read today:

"Harry* thinks we need to buy a backhoe now," commented my husband's cousin at the wedding reception table. We were catching up with family news. Harry and Donna* had moved into their own "money pit" this past year, escaping suburbia for rural New Jersey. As is often the case, there were a few little surprises in store for them at their new residence, including the state of the septic system, hence, the backhoe. Having enjoyed his experience with the borrowed machinery, Harry felt they should buy their very own backhoe, in the event of another ditch-digging emergency.

We laughed at the preposterous idea, while at the same time commiserating that there were costly tools in our very houses that our men had purchased so they could be prepared for just about anything. Donna laughed, "If I pull out both racks of my dishwasher at the same time, the whole kitchen tilts." Appliances used daily limp along while specialized drill bits gather dust in the garage.

My mother-in-law fares no better. While visiting recently, I could not get her dishwasher to start. "Oh, you have to lean against the door with your hip and jab the start button hard with the handle of a knife, " she instructed.

Our fifteen-year-old refrigerator, opened about a zillion times a day, is held together with packing tape. The interior is a cave without illumination, since the lights long ago stopped working. I hate to think what lurks in the dark corners. While I'm on the refrigerator, why is it that the little plastic shelves, which break off like saltine crackers, cost as much to replace as a new refrigerator?

My washing machine, which runs continuously, lasted fifteen years with several replacements of the agitator spline. It was a good machine, if you did not mind the sound of a jet engine just off your kitchen. It finally died from an overload of sheets and towels, and I stood agonizing over the models in the showroom. After much soul searching, I thought of Harry's backhoe, and bought the most expensive one I could afford.

*Names changed